run while you can

when something scary happens, we get scared

Suspended. The Museum of Fine Arts. Boston, MA. Winter 2015.

Suspended. The Museum of Fine Arts. Boston, MA. Winter 2015.

the smart ones say
it’s how we handle our fear
that matters,
but i’m afraid
I can’t handle my fear
because everything I’m afraid of
is out of my control,
everything that could come as a consequence
is out of my control,
everything that my life has taught me to fear
is running rampant
because I’ve been taught to fear it,
and it feeds on fear.

my mom used to say:
“don’t worry about what you can’t change.”
the first time she said this,
i breathed a new kind of breath
(called a sigh),
and along with its new noise,
it was accompanied by relief.
But then i got older and realized
that some things I fear,
i can change.
so i worry again and still,
i just don’t tell my mom
about all the worries I have.
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